SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I live in a small city and Fucknut x has been living in my neighbourhood since the D. We've been full-metal NC for a few years now, nothing but the occasional text fishing for a response. I'm an expert at the crickets and he gets zero supply from me.

Since the Covid imploded his work scene (music biz) he's been home full time, and now I find he's taken to doing his evening strolls in the public gardens two blocks from my house.

It happens to be the park where I tend to like to rest after a strenuous hill climb on my bike. I saw him coming last week and got out of there, but yesterday I was riding out toward the gates and there he was, strolling hand in hand with his latest vict.... er, squeeze.

I know he saw me coming, but I pretended to be engrossed in looking the other way as I passed them (HEY IS THAT A... "SQUIRREL"??).

I wouldn't touch him with a ten foot pole knowing what I know, and just coming within such close proximity made my skin crawl. Especially seeing the lovey-dovey couple act.

Anyone who thinks you 'just get over it' needs to get this. It's been 12 YEARS and this shit still triggers me FFS. Doesn't help that July was when we had to move into the house we closed on a few weeks before DDay.

That fucker walked me into that transaction without a flicker of guilt, with me none the wiser, and I'll never forgive him for that.

The icky feeling lingered well into my evening, which really pissed me off, but there is progress -- I didn't go into panic attack mode, those stopped a couple of years ago.

Given the current situation with the entertainment industry I expect he won't be travelling for at least another year, so this will probably become a regular occurrence. Fortunately I have many more beautiful spots to hang out on my two-wheeler adventures, but that garden was one of my healing places when I moved here seven years ago and it pains me to have to tiptoe around it now.

I'm planning on relocating to the other coast next year, so it'll be a huge bonus to never have to run into that asshole ever again.

In other news, I've been having long phone chats with a much younger and hotter songwriter friend from Nova Scotia, and he's told me that I'm the coolest person he knows. We hung out in Montreal last fall and have become quite close. Last week he actually told me he misses me. Never say never.

Thanks for listening.

Onward.

Hey FF, you're ROCKING this (music metaphor, get it?? )

Yeah, we can never forget, and fucknut sightings can trigger emotions due to the associations our memory makes. But you're not in a puddle of tears. You're not in the middle of a panic attack. Hey, you didn't even fall off your bike!!

I have found that being prepared is the best way to handle this kind of shit. Expecting things to happen so that if/when they do we're not surprised and can react appropriately, according to OUR choice and NOT how they are used to us doing.

And how DARE the fucker ruin your neighborhood!!!!!

You've got this girl!! ((((FF))))

Its so true. It doesn't even have to be a sighting to get one triggered. Just hearing about a friends betrayal brings back bad memories.

This shit sandwich never goes away, you just learn to deal with it better as it gets further down the road.

It is so unfair that it takes so damn long. Longer than we want to know.

You are rockin it. An inspiration to many of us here.

Never say never! Is that a song???

It's actually a Bieber song lol.

I'm planning on relocating to the other coast next year, so it'll be a huge bonus to never have to run into that asshole ever again.

4 years ago I moved from a small town where NPD-ex lived, to a place 2000 miles away. We lived in the same small town for over 20 years. It was healing to know I would never bump into him or his wife at my new place. It was like a 200 pound weight was taken off my shoulders.

I need to find younger guy friend. That sounds like a lot of fun.

[This message edited by Chrysalis123 at 10:47 AM, July 10th (Friday)]

I have 23 years of history here. As beautiful as it is, it's definitely getting on time for some fresh scenery!

I feel this on so many levels. My XW just bought a house 1 mile from my house.

Right after D she lived in a town about 8 miles away. It was so much better.

I use to have to see her once a week when picking up my daughter.

Now I've seen her multiple times in one day because of her close proximity.

I work in the same town I live in a lot so there are many opportunities to run in to each other.

The kicker, AP bought the house with her. It's so hard to know that he lives in my town.

The town I grew up in. UGH.

But I digress, they're in LURV.

FaithFool, If I didn't have a DD with the XW, I'd be across the country too.

I'm so sorry you have to live with that. Hugs.

Yeah, XWH lives 7 miles from me in a small town. I always check out pkg lots for his/her cars b4 entering. Didn’t realize til now, it’s taking a toll on me.,

Almost 10 years out and I still cringe after seeing him/them. But, 3 people who interact with them -plus my kids -say they have horrible fights and lots of daily drama.

FaithFool, great idea to move to other side of the country., I will be moving out of state when youngest graduates college.

patiently waiting-Hopefully you can stand to stay in your current location for your daughter. FWIW, my friend had a similar situation growing up and she says the only reason she is ok is bc her Dad was so close by. She said he was her “constant” and he was always at her events. When she had children, she knew immediately which parent she wanted be like-her Dad. ❤️

[This message edited by homewrecked2011 at 12:14 PM, July 12th (Sunday)]